Huh?!?

I'm struggling for stuff to discuss here.  It's been a very busy few weeks and lots of what we've been doing is in the same nature of the prior posting so gosh how do I keep one interested.  Well, I've got to purchase a car when I get home and I've been having a tough time trying to find something I want touching base with what I can afford.  So, if there are any fairly wealthy people out there that want to sponsor me (BMW 328i or Toyota Tundra, for instance), feel free to leave a message and I'll be back with you in a few seconds.  At any rate, I've been looking over some of my pics of our last trip down to the Pakistan border and it put me in perspective of my needs.  It could always be worse, you could be the donkey!

By the way, happy February 1!  Knocking down the months over here.  We're in double digits, hooah....n'stuff!

A Little View

I rack my brain sometimes trying to find something to send over the blog that may interest you.  After about a year of this I must admit I'm a little tapped out on things that just may.  I can share some of what we do as "Police Mentors" but little else that we do out in the field.  Often I can show you pics of places that we visit but often its not really our tactical turf so to speak.  Recently, we picked up some new police to mentor and here are some pictures of some of the training we've been conducting on site.  Mind you, "Police" is a rather watered down version of "Local Soldier" in this country so much of what we teach is more military in nature.  If the ANP look a little weird, that's because I painted their eyes.  Any real concern, no, but just in case.

What you get

This is what you get when you cross a hottie named Auburn and a rather stout bruit named Kujo.

Anatomy of the Cold

There's a truth about anatomy and physiology.  The scrotum and testicles are located on the outside of the body because optimal sperm formation occurs a few degrees cooler than core temp (about 98.6 F).  Well, ye ole' scrotum is controlled by two muscle groups that control the elevation of the testicles, assisting with their warming and cooling, and of course, optimizing sperm production.  Well, the dartos and cremaster muscles both contract in response to one of two stimuli, sexual arousal or cold.  Well, in light of the painful, tragic and dire lack of sexual arousal there can be only one reason my testicles have been resting about 2 or 3 centimeters from my heart for the last few days.......it's cold as hell!  Holy......

Um, please say you're kidding

OK, so my internet has been down for about a week.  The weather we've been having has been pretty hellacious.  We've been down in the single digits at night, the heaters have been freeazing up and the wind and rain has been so impressive that its blown sat dishes in many directions.  We actually had snow the other day as well.

So, here's my wow.  I get on iTunes to check for any new music and low and behold I see "Menudo."  Um, far be it from me to be selective about who should be on the comeback trail but...........MENUDO!  WOW!  Major migraine flashback.  As a soldier protecting my country's best interests I think I should stand up now and say no!

In other news.....Vanilla Ice and MC Hammer have released a blockbuster combo ............

White Cedar

Holy crap!  Anyone seen any white Lebanese cedar?  Afghanistan has been deforrested to a point that'd make paper companies upset and I need to build an arc before its too late!

Rain. We have rain.

So, I can count on one hand how many days its rained since May.  Make that two now.  We've had three near solid days of rain.  My new sardine can is leaking like a 62 Chevy through the front door hinge and I've got Gator, the pup, diving in my room at every chance for any reprieve from the elements.  He leaves it smelling like a wet Afghan ass (donkey.... well.... maybe), to boot.  I couldn't take it so after dinner tonight he got a shower, (sponsored in part by Dr Bonnie of Boswell Animal Clinic of Columbus, MS.) That's free plug is for the chew sticks, vitamins, collars and shampoo sent by our lovey vet clinic in MS.  Stop on by there if you get a chance, nice folks.  

Moving on........So, now he's bundled up and too lazy to get outside for his food.  I'm sure I'll pay for it about 0100 when his stomach starts to growl.  Auburn tucked herself away under a conex on the ANP side and had her pups today.  It took a while to find her.  We looked everywhere, but under the conex on their side because there's no way that fat heifer could have fit under there.  Well, she did.  I could only count three brown pups.  We'll check in the morning to see if more entered this exquisite, real estate rich country.

We picked up our new guy yesterday.  Nice guy from Syracuse, NY.  Well, this is his first deployment.  SGM and I gave him the "old, its gonna be OK speech" when we picked him up.  Told him how well the roads were around here and he had little to be concerned about.  You know, trying to assist him in relaxing and not worrying about everything that he was told to worry about during premobilization training.  Well, we were getting ready to head out when we got stood down from leaving the base.  EOD (explosive guys) were detonating an IED right outside the base.   So, we pulled over, dismounted the Humvees and had a talk.  The new guy was still in the humvee waiting for instruction.   Well, you know me........I had to say something.  SGM looked at me and knew exactly what I was thinking.  I said, I have to.  It's his first day here and after the its safe speech I gotta say something!  So, I went around the vehicle and knocked on his door.  He opened and I told him he could get out and take off his body armor because they were detonating an IED on our main route.  It was classic.......everything a moment like that could have been and more.... "Rogggeerrr tthaatt siirr,"as he dismounted the truck.   I responded, "Hey, you want some coffee while we wait?"  And at that one of the trucks went off to Tim Hortons to get some coffee while we waited for the boom.

Good times....Rain's keeping the dust down (in compliance with the all new  2008 anti-dirt lung laws of Afghanistan) and I got a little entertainment off the new guy.

Life is good.